#walk into the club like what up where’s our soviet boyfriend
[walks around with an entire big mac in my mouth but never actually biting down] It’s a metaphor, see: you put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don’t give it the power to do its killing.
"why dont you just give him a chance"
idk because im not physically or mentally attracted to him and ‘but he likes you’ or ‘but hes really nice’ isnt going to change the fact that im not interested
Look who came to my window to say hi and give me a cupcake omg omg c:
Always make sure to buckle in your baby fish in before taking it out of the apartments to visit sick Mitch.
Good to know he was safe on his way over here to visit me <3 :)
She really did ordered pizza lmao
that tip is awful i’m so PISSED
ugh i am still so pissed at this because someone tipped me $7.50 for biking 5-6 blocks w/ a sandwich and a drink that only cost $11.50 before the tip and like someone who makes more money than a person making minimum wage can’t even tip $20???
I could be wrong but I’m almost certain that $2 tip is an automatic gratuity and not an actual number millionaire superstar Ellen Degeneres typed into a website. If you think that pizza guy left the theatre with less than a grand in his pocket you are mistaken.
for the last time, Ellen borrowed Pharrell’s hat and went around collecting money from A-list actors for tips
THEY GAVE HIM THE TIP ON THE ELLEN SHOW IT WAS 1600 DOLLARS
TUMBLR STOP SEEING WRONG IN EVERYTHING
they’re so CUTE
If Lupita is the real life Disney Princess, can Jennifer be the real life quirky side kick?
This is the best one I’ve seen.